One thought ahead. Three sentences behind.

Hey Rhode Island!

A bill was recently introduced in the Senate to declare the Plains Bison America’s National Mammal. The National Bison Legacy Act is even backed by lawmakers from Wyoming, Colorado, Nebraska, Kansas, New Mexico, North and South Dakota and Rhode Island.

First of all, thank God they didn’t pick the grizzly bear. Second, what’s with Rhode Island? The Western States I can see, but one from New England? What’s the smallest state in the union championing North America’s largest mammal? When’s the last time a bison was even seen in the state? Rhode Island has enough room for one bison herd, provided the herd only visits for the day and brings its own lunch.

Did other states need one more state and Texas told them to shove off? So they looked around and saw Rhode Island standing in the corner.

It’s like Rhode Island is that kid in high school who will say yes to anything in order to hang out with the cool kids.

WYOMING: Hey Rhode Island, would you –


KANSAS: Yes to what?

RHODE ISLAND: Absolutely, whatever you need.

COLORADO: It’s just we got this stupid bill we are trying to get passed through the senate.

RHODE ISLAND: Senate, what a bunch of lames.

WYOMING: Anyway, the bill is about bison and how sick they are.

RHODE ISLAND: Awesome, I love bison. What are they?


KANSAS: No matter. We just need –

RHODE ISLAND: You got it.


RHODE ISLAND: R.I., I like that.

WYOMING: We’ll let you get back to your thing.

RHODE ISLAND: Absolutely, doing my thing, now with bison.


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