I had yet to use the outdoor commode. I’m pretty regular, usually having the number two around six in the evening, which is a fitting comment to the end of a work day. But so far two five o’clock whistles … Continue reading Lapse of Luxury Part V
After John caught a few more fish, we headed back to the camp. Knife Lake was as calm as an untouched glass of water, and yet, I saw ripples, something gliding below the surface. Chad and I stopped paddling. And … Continue reading Lapse of Luxury Part IV
“Where did they go,” Chad asked. I looked around but didn’t see them. Don and John were somewhere, but at the moment… Earlier we reached our destination – Knife Lake. Dave brought a map, and on the map were little … Continue reading Lapse of Luxury Part III
It was not how I wanted to spend the first day in the Boundary Waters, being completely underwater. Frankly, I was nervous when we pulled up to Moose Lake. I wasn’t nervous about the trip. I was worried about my … Continue reading Lapse of Luxury Part II
“You have to see it at least once.” “I’ve always wanted to go”. “You should.” “You know, when it comes to outdoor gear, all I have is a set of golf clubs.” My brother, Chad, was in the same situation. … Continue reading Lapse of Luxury Part I
January Winter. No Activity. February 1st Driving down 28th Avenue, I see off in the distance a fighter jet taking flight. I am so drawn to the blistering ascent, I don’t even notice the silver Infiniti shooting past until … Continue reading Day-to-Day – 2024
SHAMPOO Two words, side-by-side, should they be? Sham: best reserved for Ponzi schemes and late night infomercials. Poo: not something you should rub, massage or work into any part of your body. GUY Are there some parents so lazy … Continue reading Wrong Part I
THAT’S WILD There’s a bar in downtown Hopkins, MN called the Wild Boar. But if you look over the menu, you will find no feral options like bison, elk or deer. Sure, you can get Thai cream cheese wontons with … Continue reading Wrong Part II
Warning: The following essay contains language of a frank and explicit nature. The reader is encouraged to read out loud. Why do we swear? I’m sorry. Why do we flipping swear? There are as many reasons as there are swear … Continue reading Swearing Part I
SCENE FROM A CORPORATE FIRING BOSS: Asleep? Again? That’s it! Pack your things and get out. ALEX: Don’t do this. Don’t flippin’ do this. BOSS: Why not? ALEX: I’m on the edge, Mother Masher! I’m on the Clorox Bleaching edge! … Continue reading Swearing Part II
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